Smile, what's the use in crying?

I was singing a sweet old song to my daughter as I was trying to rock her to sleep. I'm not sure why I always try to sing to her, because instead of putting her to sleep it usually makes her laugh....hard. In fact, like everybody else who has ever had the misfortune of listening to me sing, I think Eva would prefer it if I just kept my mouth shut.
Honestly, the only person who truly enjoys my singing is my son Mason...and he might be deaf. That boy would love it if I laid in bed next to him singing all night long while he snuggled next to me with his little arm wrapped around my neck. Ahh, how I love that little monster.
Back, to Eva. I was looking down at her chubby little face singing "Smile, though your heart is aching. Smile, even though it's breaking..." Of course at this point she is smiling...and laughing. And, I'm pretty sure it wasn't her heart that was aching...lol! That's when I began to think about what I was saying. Do I want her to fake a smile? Most parents would instantly say "No! I want my child to be "real" and "honest". But, why does sitting down and crying or moping around have to be the "real" way?
I have never been a huge cryer. I can remember the last time I had a good cry. It was more than six months ago. Now, I did read somewhere that crying is actually healthy for you and releases some sort of toxin through your tears, so occasionally when I'm really hurting I do try and squeeze out a few tears just so I don't die or something, but other than that I just don't cry. Quite frankly I feel a little selfish and stupid for crying when I have so much to be thankful for and when I think of other people who have it way worse than I do.
I kinda want to teach my daughter to keep her chin up. Things are gonna happen. That's life. Will there be times when she absolutely can not control the tears? Of course, and I will be there to help her dry them. Life is life and I won't be able to stop her from ever getting hurt. Inevitably there will be someone at some point who does her wrong, who breaks a promise and maybe her heart. Whether its a friend, a teacher, a boyfriend or even a family member. There will be tough situations and hard decisions to make, but if I can teach her to keep moving forward with that beautiful smile on her face then I will have done my job.

Ryan

So, my son, Ryan has been quite the little hellion lately. He has taken to hitting, spitting and mouthing off to me no matter what I say. If I try and discipline him he threatens me with bodily harm ("Mom, if you send me to my room then I'm gonna punch you in the eye!") or excommunicating me from his life ("I love you, but I just don't wanna be your son anymore." or the ever popular "Fine! You're not my best friend!"). It's tough as a parent to decide what the heck you're supposed to do. Do I spank him? Isn't that teaching him to hit when he's upset? Not, to mention sometimes the kid refuses to cry and then he taunts me about the fact that I couldn't make him cry or he yells that I'm not supposed to spank him for "accidents" and tries to spank me back. Do I do time outs? My kid could care less about time out. He'll sit there and talk to himself for five minutes. Do I just ignore it and hope that eventually the bad behavior will just disappear?
Unfortunately when you bring your baby home from the hospital...or your own bath tub...wherever you chose to give birth (give me the hospital and the epidural!) you don't get a manual on how to raise a human. Don't get me wrong tons of people have written books on feeding, teething, sleeping and even disciplining, but nobody out there has written a book specific to your child and your life's situations. I've read a few of these "helpful" books and nowhere have I found the section on how to deal with a four year old if he hawks a loogie in your eye (he got spanked AND sent to bed early for that one.).
So, imagine my surprise when, after a particularly trying day, I look over at my son in church and he is standing there with his eyes squeezed shut and his hands raised shouting praises to the Lord. I almost wanted to take pics and videos just to prove that he does indeed talk to God and not the devil. I mean the kid was really going at it. He was saying things like "Thank you, Jesus." and "I love you, Lord." and, my personal fave "I bow before your glory." What?! I bow before your glory? Where did he even hear that? This kid knows how to worship better than I do and I'm positive he made God smile tonight (thankfully, since he's probably been making Him weep all week).
Ryan's not all bad. I don't want to scare off any play dates you guys might have been thinking about ;-) He has many really lovable moments. He's always hugging me and telling me he loves me. He loves to dress up and put gel in his hair and a tie around his neck and then ask me if I think he looks "sharp"...lol! He's a really great big brother. He always makes Eva laugh and he loves to play with Mason and give him advice on how to be a good super hero. He loves to laugh!!!! I love laughing with him :-) But, what I love most about him is his confidence. Whether it's walking out of the house in a Larry Boy tie or standing his ground about something he wants or raising his hands in church, he does it with everything he's got. He's not shy or apologetic. I hope his confidence never leaves. I find it to be quite amazing and inspiring.
Anyways, it's times like these and the times when he wraps his little arms around my neck and plants one right on my mouth that I know, manual or not, I must be doing something right.